firewhispers: (Default)
I took half a clonazepam a few hours ago because I was so upset and I felt like I was about to have a panic attack. It made me really sleepy. :/
I don't know what to make for dinner.
I went outside and sat up in the bleachers at showers field. That's my new favorite spot. I wrote a journal entry and a song that turned out sort of ok.
A bunch of people came and they were skating on the side walks and down the stairs. I wanted to skate with them but I didn't know them and felt too fucked up from the clonazepam to skate.
I'm so lame. I wish I would skated with them even though I really suck at it. I was nervous they would judge me or make fun of me.
I want to sleep...........
firewhispers: (Default)
I feel like there's something missing in my life and I can't exactly figure out what.
firewhispers: (Default)
My images are now suddenly locked? What's going on? They were viewable yesterday, now it's a blue box thing. What the hell is going on?
firewhispers: (Default)
I want to walk around downtown and take pictures of anything and everything.
I want to go a different way than I usually do on the walk way.
I wish I had friends to take stupid/random pictures and videos with.
I want to go to Devils Night next month.
I want to grow a beard. Or side burns.
I want to learn how to tailor.
I want to move out of DuBois.
I want to dye my hair black again.
I want to practice so I don't completely suck at playing guitar.

I want to play bass in an actual band!
I want to play bass in a screamo/emo band, play shows anywhere we can, meet other musicians and kids, get pictures and videos taken of us, and make awesome music even if we don't make any money from it. I don't want to be famous. I just want people to know that I exist.
firewhispers: (Default)
I haven't practiced bass in a while. At least a week.
I have thoughts about just giving up being a musician and quitting. But then I don't know what else I would do.

It makes me sad that my 20s are going by and I'm doing nothing I've dreamed I would be doing. Nothing I hoped I would have done or accomplished. I'm still living in this shit hole dying town that makes me miserable.

I wish I knew if better times were ahead.
This year has just been awful.
firewhispers: (Default)
Last night, I google'd experimental screamo and I found this one band- My Own Private Alaska. They are so fucking good. This song is amazing. If I start a band, I hope we sound similar to this.

On another note, I'm a little bummed that my To Write Love On Her Arms shirts aren't coming in the mail today.

I update this a lot.
firewhispers: (Default)
Is it really September already?
Crazy shit how fast this year has went.
The past two years flew right by me.
firewhispers: (Default)
I want to get back into writing poetry again.
Good poetry, not the horrid shit I wrote and called poetry when I was 14/15.
firewhispers: (Default)
"Please note that Abuse Prevention Team is not obliged to send you an email notification on the reason of your journal's suspension."
Really, livejournal? Really?
This really pisses me off.
firewhispers: (Default)
Fuck.
Livejournal suspended my account.
Fuck you!
firewhispers: (Default)
I just went to check the weather and supposedly my county and a bunch of others are under a severe thunderstorm watch. The alert was posted 45 minutes ago.
It's currently 84 degrees out and sunny.
Wtf weather?
I'm starting to second guess whether or not to go on a walk.
firewhispers: (Default)
Last night, I found out Chester Bennington, the singer of Linkin Park died. He committed suicide. While I was never really into Linkin Park, this made me very sad. Depression and suicide are very serious and very real. Rest easy, Chester. You will be missed by many.
firewhispers: (Default)
I ate way too much white cheddar popcorn and had a Degrassi marathon yesterday. I watched the episode when Craig's dad died and it made me really sad.
I haven't logged onto LJ in a few weeks and I'm a little paranoid to while I'm at my parents house. I'm worried about getting a virus from that site. Is LJ still safe to be on even though the servers are in Russia? I have some LJ comments to reply to and I'll get to them soon. I've been learning about ransom ware too and that really isn't helping with me being paranoid. I accidentally clicked on an ad on LJ and I almost shit my pants, it really freaked me out.
I'm going to keep this entry public. Not sure why.
firewhispers: (Default)
That entry was pretty long. Tis great. I need to start posting longer entries.
firewhispers: (Default)
I just looked at the date and I can't believe it's May 1st already.

For some reason, I really like May.
firewhispers: (musician)
For some reason, I couldn't get on livejournal all day yesterday. It kept saying 502 error or something like that.
Merry Christmas and happy holidays, everyone!
firewhispers: (musician)
12745948_1730227413930211_6127431266770475967_n
Lol.
firewhispers: (musician)
12745509_1333226150036893_7989493377763538686_n
This is actually very accurate, haha.
firewhispers: (musician)
1937080_465413040315708_1964237962166659428_n
Even though I'm not a teen or adolescent anymore. I just wish more than anything that my family would understand and accept this and start calling me Devin. I've tried explaining to them and talking about it to them numerous times. They won't accept me or even try to educate themselves about transgender.
I'm not your daughter, sister, niece, or a she.
I'm your son, brother, nephew, and a he.
I'm Devin.
firewhispers: (bass)


Not exactly sure how I found this video on youtube, but it is very cute, lol. I think this kangaroo was just trying to find their car.

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